Listen all you rich, guilt-ridden, Obama-lovers out there. Are you trying to hide your good fortune from your liberal friends? Do you feel a bit hypocritical, with all those people unemployed and on food stamps, when you sneak in and plunk down the $100,000 for your new S550 Mercedes or the 700 BMW?
Are you embarrassed to tell your salesman that in spite of your wealth and success, you still voted for Obama? Why not avoid this situation altogether by buying a new, fully-electric, politically correct, model S Tesla?
Most people have never even heard of this new car company or even know how much these cars really cost. Joe Biden was really upset with you when you didn’t join the very few last year who actually bought one (only 2,500!). So, to entice you back to their showroom to try this year’s new “gem,”Tesla Corp. recently sold a billion dollars of their stock (you heard me right, a billion).
With the money they raised, they paid back the $452 million that Obama lent them, just to “get started.” The $548 million remaining? Who knows?
The Wall Street Journal reported that Tesla’s co-founder Elon Musk, is now worth over $4 billion. That’s even more than Al Gore’s paltry net worth of only 1.2 Billion.
Oh, I forgot, Al is just “a regular working guy.” By the way, Elon Musk is the same investor who received $344 million of our taxpayer dollars for his other “politically correct” company, ”Solar City.” These days, being a rich liberal investing in all these social causes is a lot more lucrative than being a Republican.
Any idea how much last year’s Tesla S cost?
Remember, it’s “poor” Al Gore’s favorite electric car. It cost an astounding $109,000. Don’t make me repeat that. Tesla’s battery “stunk” and there were no roadside places to charge it.
For you closet, affluent progressives living in Beverly Hills, it is quite important just to own one of these Teslas. You don’t even have to drive it. Last year, some liberal Scarsdale residents impressed their neighbors with their visible solar panels.
This year its going to be a new all-electric Tesla sitting in their driveway. At Great Neck’s Glen Oaks Country Club, members are encouraging each other to buy one in their fight against global warming. Don’t worry, you can also afford another Rolex.
Great news, this year’s Tesla is yours for the “bargain” price of only $70,000. In addition, Obama is also giving you a $7,500 federal tax credit. Now, your chauffeur doesn’t even have to waste time “filling it up.” Wait a minute, after a full year in production, still only 9,650 of you have bought one. So, in order to help you even more:
1 – California gave Tesla a 10 million dollar grant. Tell that to the residents of Stockton, the latest California city to file for bankruptcy.
2 – Others, like Colorado, have added $6,000 more in state income-tax credits. Again, lets help Nancy Pelosi get one. She needs the added incentive.
3 – Rebates, free parking, no state sales tax, and the use of HOV lanes were also added. I was surprised that Senator Gillibrand didn’t suggest a free Tesla for everyone getting food stamps.
4 – Some states, like California, are requiring traditional car-makers to sell a certain number of electric cars or else they must pay a “zero emission credit”! Who gets that money? Tesla of course! Please sit down before you read this follow up.
1- In 2013, Tesla will receive $250 million dollars in these credits! That’s million with an “M.” No wonder Tesla reported a profit. They make millions if GM and Chrysler don’t sell electric cars.
2 – Of you remove these credits, Tesla actually lost $53 million dollars in the first quarter alone or it lost $10,000 per car sold. Amazing. Thanks WSJ.
3 – A Morgan Stanley report says we are subsidizing $45,000 for each car they make.
And now the worst of the worst:
Guess how much of our money Tesla plans on spending next year, to develop their third generation Tesla?
Take a guess? One billion dollars! You can’t make this up.
Do not read the following without your psychiatrist’s approval.
Ready? Tesla Corp. only produced 4,500 jobs. Must I repeat that? A grand total of only 4,500 jobs.
We have paid Obama’s friends to built the Tesla S, subsidized his rich supporters to buy it and used our taxes to finance it. Pure Obama-economics.
Dr Stephen Morris DDS
North Hills
