Every literate person on earth knows about Dorothy and her ruby slippers which helped her along on the yellow brick road.
What they may not know is that in the Frank Baum book, upon which the “Wizard of Oz” was based, Dorothy does not receive ruby slippers by instead is given a kiss on her forehead from the Good Witch of the North.
This kiss created a scar which was something that protected her from all the evil that she faced.
This classic symbol of maternal love, guidance and protection is something I have grown more and more aware of as a key element of athletic success.
Nearly every world class athlete I have worked with as a sport psychologist has a strong connection with a mother who loves and respects them unconditionally. The most famous example of this phenomenon was with Tiger Woods whose mother was so devoted to him that she never ever used a babysitter. Not once.
So let us take a look at the power of maternal love on a local level.
There is a local girl named Molly Josephs who is now a world class race walker and who will be at the Olympic Trials in Eugene Oregon this summer.
She was raised in Garden City, just five miles south of Williston Park and I had a chance to interview her mom this week to explore the idea of maternal love and how it instills ambition and courage in the elite athlete.
Nancy Josephs is a school teacher and her husband is a physical education teacher.
She herself was an elite cyclist until an injury ended her career.
Her granddad was a commander in the Navy which no doubt gave her both a sense of discipline and a sense of pride.
Throughout the interview what I was seeking to find is what we call the ego ideal.
This is the implanted goal, the legacy or what we call our destiny that is absorbed through the parents.
Every high level athlete I have known has an unconscious ego ideal or hidden quest that they seek out and will not rest until they achieve it. It’s like our personal search for the Holy Grail. And this search is dictated by our ego ideal.
So it did not surprise me to learn not only that Molly’s mom was an elite athlete herself, that her career was cut short nor that Nancy’s grandfather was a naval commander.
There was the family legacy the children were given.
I have long known that athletes sacrifice for their sport and also that the parents tend to sacrifice even more.
The cost of traveling to tournaments, of hotel bills, of extra coaching and extra camps mount up and often cost parents tens of thousands of dollars each year.
Ms. Josephs told me that Molly is given world class coaching by Olympic star Tim Seaman of Texas and by Tish Hanna at Missouri Baptist University.
I think it is obvious to athletes that this kind of love and support is given to them and this becomes part of their motivation to succeed. The parents give love freely and with hope.
The payoff to the parents of course is not only a sense of pride but in gaining pleasure by watching their children perform with beauty and grace.
When Molly walks it is unlike others. It actually does look beautiful.
This legacy of love that the children receive is internalized and does become their goals and their dreams to win.
This maternal investment pays off and gives them drive and courage and tenacity and ambition. Tiger Woods was by far the most tenacious and driven athlete I have ever met. In part thanks to his mother.
Molly Joseph, our local star, is enormously tenacious as well as driven. And it is my bet that a large part of her desire and her will to succeed was found in her mother’s kiss upon her forehead. I have always been troubled by the term ‘soccer mom’ because it trivializes their function.
Pinocchio’s Blue Fairy, Don Quixote’s Dulcinea and Dorothy’s Good Witch of the North are iconic figures in literature because they all express the special role of the mother.
Without maternal love and support the athlete would have no backbone and no heart.
So bravo to Nancy Josephs and all the other ‘soccer moms’ in Williston Park who sacrifice and love their kids day in and day out 365 days a year.
