Do people actually enjoy their summer vacations? I think not. People assiduously plan, pay for and hope that their summer vacation will be a joy equal to finding the Holy Grail. At least that’s how I approach it. The writer Spalding Gray was a friend of mine and one of his books was titled “Impossible Vacation” in which he describes his attempt to find that one redemptive “perfect moment” that would take all his troubles and cares away and finally give him a sense that life was actually worth living.
The film “Paris, Je t’aime” addresses the troubles and/or triumphs of a vacation and the final scene is a heartbreaking soliloquy given by a lonely middle-aged postal worker who has just returned from her Paris vacation and speaks in halting French to her fellow adult education French students about the time spent there. The last line was “I fell in love with Paris and Paris fell in love with me.” The screenwriter deserved an Oscar nomination for that line alone.
As a psychoanalyst I am struck by how unable people are to describe any of the beauty of what they experience on vacation.
But just recently I became aware of how you can unlock the magic of vacations. Last week I was climbing up a long stairway getting out of the building where my gym is situated. The escalator is no longer working so we all have to climb down the 36 steps to get to the gym and then climb up these same 36 steps to get out.
As I was trekking up the steps I hit the top and was suddenly reminded of two other staircases I have climbed in the past. The first one was the 122 steps leading up Capitoline Hill in Rome in order to get to the Michelangelo’s Palazzo dei Conservervatori. Some of the more devote Catholics in Italy climb these iconic stone steps every Xmas in order to atone for their sins. I am not sure I would recommend this to any but the most severely guilt-ridden because just walking up these steps was challenge enough for me. When you get to the top, you are rewarded with priceless views of Rome with the Vatican in the distance, the Forum and the Roman Coliseum.
The second stairway I recalled was the one at L’Auberge de Sedona along the banks of Oak Creek in Sedona. This gem of an inn is hidden deep in the valley and to get to the main part of town one must climb 98 steps. This is no mean task but when you get to the top you are greeted with an astounding view of the famed Red Rock Country in all its glory.
But surly I am not telling you that the way to unlock the secrets of finding those perfect moments on vacation involves trekking up endless steps to the top. It’s like saying, “Hey, kids, let’s go find ourselves 200 steps to climb. Sounds like fun right?”
But in some way that is exactly what I am saying. The two stairways I described are exactly like Dante’s “Divine Comedy,” which told us long ago that if you want to get to heaven, you need to climb out of hell, then climb your way up through purgatory, too. It’s a long and painful journey to the top. Isn’t that exactly what vacations are like?To go on vacation is an enormous uphill climb. First you must work very hard and save your money (tough.) Then you must book a flight (tough.) Then you must endure an economy class flight with screaming children and irate passengers (very tough.) When you land, you must find a cab and get to the hotel without being ripped off (kind of tough.) After that you must plan an itinerary (tough again.) Following that you must stick to the itinerary despite some measure of jet lag and anxiety (once again quite tough.) But it is only by traveling to world class destination spots that you will be able to behold iconic forms of beauty. Beauty is not to be found in Jersey City or Newark or Queens or Staten Island. Jersey City may argue that point, but you know I’m right.Only by climbing the 122 steps up Capitoline Hill will you see those views of the Vatican to the west and the Forum to the east. Only by climbing those 98 steps in from Oak Creek to the top will you be afforded the views of Red Rock Country. And if these sights are not heaven itself, then heaven does not exist. Dante described heaven as a huge circle with angels flying around it, but I describe heaven as the Eiffel Tower in Paris or the Ville D’Este on Lake Como or that statue of the Capitoline Wolf with the mythical twins Remus and Romulus suckling on the mother wolf in Michelangelo’s Piazza in Rome.
In the film “As Good as it Gets” Jack Nicholson’s character is walking out of his psychoanalyst’s office, sees the patients in the waiting room and remarks “is this as good as it gets?” Or in the end of Ozu’s masterpiece, “Tokyo Story,” the luminescent and remarkable actress Setsuko Hara comments to her sister-in-law “ Yes, life is disappointing sister, life is very disappointing.”
But if I ever were to write a film, I would end it with two men sitting in a café with one character saying “Boy life really sucks” and the other smiling at him and answering “Yeah, it does suck but we do have the Eiffel Tower, Yosemite Park and Pebble Beach, too. Isn’t that enough? ”
And to think I learned all that just by climbing up some stairs. So gird your loins and go take your vacation this summer and bring home a good story to share with your neighbors.
Climbing stairs can make your vacation magical
