As a kid growing up on Long Island my family was involved with horse breeding and thoroughbred racing so I met many world-class athletes at the races.
I became accustomed to sitting next to or playing golf with celebrity athletes from the world of football, baseball, boxing and horse racing. I was a quiet, well behaved, and observant kid and listened carefully to what they said, how they acted, how much money they made and how they were treated by adoring fans.
I have seen jockeys with shoeboxes filled with money and I have had dinners with celebrities and noted how the entire restaurant was looking at them the whole time. However, it wasn’t until years later after I earned my Ph.D. and became a full-time sport psychologist that I came to understand the actual experience of working with the superstars and to taste firsthand the pressure that comes with the territory.
It is glamorous to play in front of cheering fans but glamour is by no means the whole story. Let’s take a quick trip inside the ropes to give you a taste of what it’s actually like to work with them.
This week is a perfect example to talk about since I work with one of the world’s best golfers who at this very moment is playing for a $15,000,000 purse at the Tour Championship at East Lake in Atlanta, Ga.
I shall not say who that person is but how he manages to cope with this kind of pressure is beyond me. As part of his support team I cringe with anxiety over every shot he takes yet he remains cool and calm. Here is a list of adjectives to best describe what it’s like to work with a superstar.
1. Admiration: When you get to know them well you see how gifted they actually are. When Tiger Woods was a young pro he demonstrated his natural fun-loving talent by casually walking down the fairway during a pro/am and saying ‘see that green over there behind the trees…watch this’ as he continued to walk, toss a ball into the air and without missing a stride, swatted the ball with his 7 iron held in one hand and hit the ball onto the green.
That’s a pure physical gift. Another player I am still working with was on television during the 9/11 tribute at Madison Square Garden and when she was introduced by Billie Crystal, he accidentally dropped the mike as he handed it to her and without batting an eye she caught the mike before it hit the ground all the while looking at him, smiling and answering one of his questions. Crystal then quipped “Wow, great hands!”
2. Massive Anxiety: The superstar has a nervous system that seems wired for handling high pressure but that doesn’t mean his support staff does. So I resort to interesting forms of distraction in order to cope with the action.
I often find myself washing the kitchen floor as a watch them on TV. And I will often resort to superstitious behavior like sitting in specific ways to try to influence shot outcomes. This kind of behavior always comes from a feeling of total helplessness when faced with serious anxiety.
3. Riveted attention: When a superstar athlete is preparing for a big game or tournament they tend to go into the zone and become quiet and withdrawn and their support staff goes into riveted attention which pertains to literally everything they are doing. When is he getting to sleep, how is he feeling, what is he eating, etc. etc.
4. Media distortions: One soon realizes that world-famous athletes are actually normal people, with some nice traits and some not so nice traits but with other worldly talent that has skyrocketed them to the top.
This brings intense scrutiny of the media where every word they say is analyzed, deconstructed and criticized if it is not letter-perfect and politically correct. This will often result in a false narrative which the public picks up on and then shouts back to the athlete. This is the worst in horse racing where fans bet money and if their jockey loses a race they will scream at them in unrelenting and vulgar ways. Inflammatory rhetoric is seen in golf especially during Ryder cup matches where nationalism is inflamed.
5. Never-ending work: Every star athlete I know is an extreme over worker. You may have seen Rory McIlroy in an interview following his FedEx win in Atlanta. He was notably tangential and halting in speech and was astute enough to recognize his own exhaustion and quickly apologized to the TV commentator for being so tired.
He said “Gee, I guess I really am exhausted right now so I apologize to you. And by tonight I will be on a flight to play in Switzerland later this week.”
Years ago a player I was working with someone who won an Espy Award which would have been presented in Los Angelos. Despite the league’s willingness to hire her private jet to fly her out and back she refused to go and remarked “I have traveled to 19 countries over the last three months. I am not getting on another plane.”
The life of a superstar brings glamour, money and fame but there is a downside as well. Uniformly they are overtired, overworked, depleted and are rarely home to celebrate simple things like birthday parties.
I do feel privileged to be a part of all that and I am filled with lots of admiration for their ability to cope with the endless demands. And I realize how lucky I am to work in the same neighborhood every day and to be able to go home every night and sleep in my own bed. In the end, the simple pleasures in life are not to be ignored.
