Your 18-year-old is going to college. Despite what you may feel, she will now be considered an adult in the eyes of the law and university.
Your legal rights to make decisions on behalf of your child are entirely changed the moment she turns 18; it’s important you are prepared for what this means once she leaves home.
You may still pay for everything in your child’s life, but the reality is you no longer have complete access to her financial, educational, or health records. However, all is not lost; with a little bit of planning you will be able to establish some legal authority to make important financial and health decisions for your child until she is entirely independent.
Before you unpack those extra-long twin sheets and set up her microwave and mini fridge it would be wise to set up a healthcare proxy and power of attorney to be prepared for anything that happens along the way.
You may be asking yourself what is a healthcare proxy and why do I need one when my child is perfectly healthy? It’s the same reason why you have insurance and (hopefully) a will prepared: unforeseen events will always happen. It’s wise to take every precaution now so that in the case of an emergency you can tackle things head on.
The healthcare proxy will allow your child to appoint you or another trusted adult to make medical decisions for her in the event she is unable to herself. This healthcare proxy should also include HIPPA language, which would enable the doctor to disclose vital medical information to you.
Illness can happen more quickly than you think and when you are towns, and in some cases states, away from your child you will want information as quickly as possible.
I learned of a story a few years ago that began when a couple dropped off their excited 18-year-old daughter at a high-ranking university across the country. Both parents stayed in a nearby hotel for a few days to make sure that their child had adequately settled in before making their way back home.
Three weeks later, an RA called to inform them their daughter was taken to the hospital with a serious case of the flu where she was promptly admitted. The RA was no longer there as she had to get back to her shift, and their daughter and was too ill to speak on the phone.
Unfortunately, these well-meaning parents hadn’t thought to setup a healthcare proxy, leaving the doctors and nurses unable to disclose any information on her status citing strict HIPPA laws that protect patient confidentiality.
The parents frantically called their lawyer on their way to the airport in extreme distress. They were leaving on the first plane they could book and wanted his help to have access to their daughter’s medical information.
He was able to prepare a healthcare proxy for them, but without their daughter’s signature, the papers would be useless until they landed and had her sign in the presence of witnesses.
In the end, their daughter recovered after a week in the hospital and two more weeks of bedrest, but the ordeal would have been much less fraught and anxiety provoking if they had had immediate access to her medical information.
But, your child’s physical health isn’t the only contingency you should prepare for; her financial health should be equally considered.
If your child decides to study abroad during her time as an undergraduate, a durable power of attorney will enable you to wire money from your child’s account to her or even sign important documents — such as a lease for a place to live — in her absence.
While these may seem like trivial things now, you don’t want to be stuck in a last-minute situation powerless to lend any assistance.
All of these legal preparations will make your life infinitely easier once the school year begins, so don’t forget to put these documents on your to do list before the semester begins.
Patricia Marcin and Farrell Fritz
